I guess my question with manifesting is

 What happens on the days when you don't believe it?

When the desire is too hard to bear and it's easier to learn to let go like

maybe wanting, or believing it's already happened when i don't see it, is making me feel like

i'm too rooted in the human condition. too rooted in wanting perfection. in wanting the love the love the love and the house and the comfort and the kids and the joy and the abundance of everything

what if it's making me depressed to have to plaster a smile on my face, like dismissing this emotion thats boiling up inside of me instead of letting it show will eventually turn to a sickness that'll take over my every thought until the pot spills

what if im tired of making magic. of giving intentions. and just want to be as i am

without those things i want

and with what i have

this soft body of mine and its hurt

what if instead of ignoring i need to let myself feel so i can tend to my wounds

what if i want the universe, the energies, to dwell in the whisper-low vibrations that come with eating the last morsel of emotion i have left to give 

instead of constantly feeding it my hunger